You Look Pretty!
Friday, March 30, 2007 at 11:11AM 
You = Venus (Botticelli, 1485)We all have those kinds of days, you know, when you just don't feel...pretty? I've been having a lot lately. I'm not entirely in love with my current wardrobe, and without the appropriate funds to go get a new one, I need to make do with what I have. "Making do" is not conducive to feeling fabulous, n'est ce pas? Other than that, I can't wear my jeans any more, and now the high heels are out too. My triathlon training is great, but as anyone whose done this kind of training knows, it changes your body. You're much fitter and trimmer, true, but other areas increase as your muscles get bigger - namely the back, arms, and shoulders. I used to love so many of my cute tops but now I feel like a football player in them. They're loose where they used to fit, and snug in the areas that used to be loose - ugh! Throw in other less-than-desirable fashion options and a bad hair day and it's all over but the cryin'.
The beauty routine is a great regimen to hang on to when feeling this way - it's an anchor. It signifies that you are doing all you can to be beautiful on the exterior. But the routine can get a little boring sometimes, especially when you're wearing the same eyeshadow color again. This was another of my predicaments, so I switched my usual shades of brown eyeshadow to NARS's new "Habanera" color combo - a little sixties pop in the palette. This little change has helped, as most little changes do, but being a girl who can barely remember to throw on lipgloss in the morning, I wasn't sure how far an eyeshadow color could carry my confidence...yet still, I press on.
This is the thing about not feeling pretty - you still have to get out in the world and do your thing. Work, school, gym, friends, boys, parties...they don't stop coming around just because you aren't feeling yourself.
Then, an idea occured to me...
I was on the bus (how many posts have I written about that?) and saw so many of the fabulous ladies in their cute work-a-day outfits. Some were especially polished, pulled-together, and confident. I admired them from behind my giant Oliver Peoples, and could only hope that they thought the same of me. As my bus waited to make it's final turn off of California Street, it pulled up right next to a cable car. On the exterior running board was a really lovely girl. Nothing remarkable, she just looked...well, pretty.
I thought: "Someone should tell her she looks pretty today." I thought that it is entirely possible that she may go through her entire day without anyone telling her that. Her girlfriends may, as girlfriends do...but what if no one does? Then I thought: "I should tell her she looks pretty today." The thought made me smile. You know the smile - it's the smile someone smiles at you when they want to tell you you look pretty, but can't, because they don't know you...you've seen it before, and probably given it before. But what about saying it for real?
Of course, this idea is a nice one, but how would a perfect stranger receive this kind of compliment? Would they think you're a complete kook? A werido? Trying to pick them up? Sure, we love it when someone random compliments our shoes, or haircut, or handbag, but does any perfect stranger compliment another perfect stranger on the whole package, head-to-toe? Think about it. There you are in line to get your coffee, looking amazing, and someone you've never met says: "Hey - you look really pretty today." How would you feel?
Those of us of a certain age will no doubt remember the Impulse Fragrance advertisements of the 1980s: "If a man you've never met before suddenly gives you flowers..." and while the sentiment is a bit of the same, it's different. This is just saying "you're pretty" without any strings (like romance) attached. It's a "just because" idea - like paying it forward, you say it to someone today, and then some day someone else will say it to you.
My bus turned the corner and the girl on the cable car kept on her way...and I still wonder if anyone told her how pretty she looked. Why wasn't it me? Optimistically, I'd like to think that some how her prettiness would rub off on me, making me feel a little bit prettier, but letter her know that she looked pretty...
I dare everyone out there to tell the next person they see who's looking really great to tell them so. Imagine how you'd feel - I think it would make your day, just because you're making their day. It's good to be a giver. What do you think?
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